To be clear, I decided that gastric bypass is not the option for me at this time in my life.
How did I inspire myself to do what I'm doing? Depression and results. Let me explain.
A friend of mine is doing a 100 day juice feast (yes feast). He's half way thru his 100 days and he's lost 40lbs already. It's inspiring to me, however I am not ready at this point to do such a feast. I need to start small, work up to bigger.
He inspired me so much I bought a 100 dollar juicer. OMGosh!! It's awesome!!! It's fun and rewarding. I wasn't expecting to drink the juice and feel full, but I do!
My readers may not agree with this next bit... I HATE eating vegetables but drinking them, this I can do. So I've decided not to stress out about the veggies I eat and be happy with myself for drinking them. For now anyway, the majority of greens I'll intake will be from juicing. This is a huge improvement since I'm coming from zero vegetable intake to like, a shit tone!
Now there's the amount of food or portions I'm intaking for the rest of my food. This is were the depression comes in.
I had an appointment with my psychiatrist a week ago. I was totally depressed. I broke down, mostly unrelated to weight. However, as I have previously stated, my weight is impacting my quality of life.
I looked at her, knowing the answer to the question I was about to ask, but asked anyway, "is there anything that can help my weight?"
"Yes."
....
Yes? Yes? Wait... YES??? This was not the answer I was expecting or accustomed to when asking health care professionals about weight loss aids.
We've discussed before how the dose of Abilify I'm on (20mg) is like fighting an impossible uphill battle with weight. We've tried lowering that dose and I don't bode well. So she said we could try a drug called Topamax.
We discussed, and I agreed to give it a try as a weight loss aid.
Slight disclaimer, Topamax is not a weight loss drug, and has some serious side effects. I've thought about going into detail, but I'll leave my readers too their own research. I've done mine.
With this drug aid, the juicing, and exercise, I'm hoping to see change. I will set a blog aside to discuss my 'Couch to 5k' exercise program, and I will also continue to discuss how the new drug regime goes.
So that's it readers, my weight loss aid story. Comments are always welcome and stay tuned for the ongoing saga!
Monday, January 30, 2012
Weight Loss Aid: Part 1
I've been debating actually writing about this because I know its got the potential to be controversial. So before I jump in I'll give my readers some background.
About two years ago I was visiting my doctor for something important to my health at the time. He just sort if mentioned in passing that my insurance would cover gastric bypass... wait, WHAT?
I was in shock and upset that he even mentioned it. Was I THAT big? Did I really qualify for THAT option? At any rate, it freaked me out enough too not ask any more questions and try and lose weight on my own.
About a year ago I visited the doctor and experienced a very similar scenario. This time I was more mentally prepared. Still totally against the idea but this time aware that he was going to want to discuss the whole pre- diabetic thing at the very least. Which is what originally prompted him to mention gastric bypass to begin with.
I had a plan which consisted of not eating sugar, that didn't work. I had another plan of eating more veggies, nope. My point being, the 'diet' plans didn't work for me.
About four months ago I started to consider the possibility that maybe I am a candidate for gastric bypass. I did what any good patient does and asked my doctor about it.
He gave me the information to look up and advised me to think about it.
It looked good, no, it looked great! It looked like a light at the end of my tunnel.
But then, other life circumstances arrived, and all of this hope was put on hold.
In fact, I've realized that gastric bypass is not for me right now, who knows what my future will hold, but for now I'm looking toward alternatives in my weight loss journey.
Stay tuned for these alternatives in part 2!
About two years ago I was visiting my doctor for something important to my health at the time. He just sort if mentioned in passing that my insurance would cover gastric bypass... wait, WHAT?
I was in shock and upset that he even mentioned it. Was I THAT big? Did I really qualify for THAT option? At any rate, it freaked me out enough too not ask any more questions and try and lose weight on my own.
About a year ago I visited the doctor and experienced a very similar scenario. This time I was more mentally prepared. Still totally against the idea but this time aware that he was going to want to discuss the whole pre- diabetic thing at the very least. Which is what originally prompted him to mention gastric bypass to begin with.
I had a plan which consisted of not eating sugar, that didn't work. I had another plan of eating more veggies, nope. My point being, the 'diet' plans didn't work for me.
About four months ago I started to consider the possibility that maybe I am a candidate for gastric bypass. I did what any good patient does and asked my doctor about it.
He gave me the information to look up and advised me to think about it.
It looked good, no, it looked great! It looked like a light at the end of my tunnel.
But then, other life circumstances arrived, and all of this hope was put on hold.
In fact, I've realized that gastric bypass is not for me right now, who knows what my future will hold, but for now I'm looking toward alternatives in my weight loss journey.
Stay tuned for these alternatives in part 2!
Saturday, January 28, 2012
Before Pictures and Non- Failures
Today was the first day I didn't do anything productive toward my weight health plan. However now that I write that I realized maybe I am judging myself too harshly.
I had tentative plans to run today before a Saturday morning commitment I have. This did not happen. And I didn't beat myself up! Progress!
What I did do; called the pharmacy to see if my pills were ready yet, (yes pills that will aid in weight loss- stay tuned) and I ended up buying a pair of running shoes. Which I desperately needed.
I also went to a friends house and had her take some 'before' pics. Which excite me.
Lastly, apart from the cookie, my food intake wasn't all that bad... Again not beating myself up for cookie!
So I guess, although I didn't get the physical goal done, I did a lot of things that'll help me on my way toward my physical goal. This feels good!
I am finding that if I break down my days, I do tend to do something that is helpful toward my goal ( whatever the goal may be ) even if it's not obviously apparent. I love this, because it helps me realize that I am motivated and I can do this!
Here are some pics, my tentative plan is to post monthly with a comparison pic, but we shale see what unfolds! Enjoy!
I had tentative plans to run today before a Saturday morning commitment I have. This did not happen. And I didn't beat myself up! Progress!
What I did do; called the pharmacy to see if my pills were ready yet, (yes pills that will aid in weight loss- stay tuned) and I ended up buying a pair of running shoes. Which I desperately needed.
I also went to a friends house and had her take some 'before' pics. Which excite me.
Lastly, apart from the cookie, my food intake wasn't all that bad... Again not beating myself up for cookie!
So I guess, although I didn't get the physical goal done, I did a lot of things that'll help me on my way toward my physical goal. This feels good!
I am finding that if I break down my days, I do tend to do something that is helpful toward my goal ( whatever the goal may be ) even if it's not obviously apparent. I love this, because it helps me realize that I am motivated and I can do this!
Here are some pics, my tentative plan is to post monthly with a comparison pic, but we shale see what unfolds! Enjoy!
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Weight vs Health
I know right? I personally believe that a healthy weight is so important to a healthy lifestyle. Yet here I am thinking to myself, if I loose a bunch of weight boys will want me more. Which is sadly, probably true.
But for me it's not about boys/girls/etc... It's about being able to tie my shoes without it causing pain and shorten of breath. There are other ways weight has effected me, walking, using the bathroom, sweating, amongst a few...
It's time for change. I need change.
I don't publish my weight often or even like to mention it in passing... But I feel like part of the process is getting honest.
Yesterday I weighted in at 319.4lbs. I'm not proud of this nor do I want to beat myself up for it either. It's a stage in my journey... It's a step in the direction I want to take. It's time!
Health is more important to me then looks... If I keep this up I will die. That's not really okay with me. I am beautiful but I am not healthy.
I crave life.
But for me it's not about boys/girls/etc... It's about being able to tie my shoes without it causing pain and shorten of breath. There are other ways weight has effected me, walking, using the bathroom, sweating, amongst a few...
It's time for change. I need change.
I don't publish my weight often or even like to mention it in passing... But I feel like part of the process is getting honest.
Yesterday I weighted in at 319.4lbs. I'm not proud of this nor do I want to beat myself up for it either. It's a stage in my journey... It's a step in the direction I want to take. It's time!
Health is more important to me then looks... If I keep this up I will die. That's not really okay with me. I am beautiful but I am not healthy.
I crave life.
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